8 Signs You’re Dating An Immature Man or Woman

awkward-couple-featureIt is my personal belief that every person comes into our life for a reason. If this is true, it is important for us to consider the spiritual tests that come with each friendship to allow us to grow. These tests come to us every time someone challenges our sensibilities about who we are or what we will tolerate in any given relationship. Again, when we choose not to pass our spiritual tests or ignore the writing on the wall, we pay a significant price for our lapse in judgment. Being in a romantic relationship with an immature man or woman is like managing a high-schooler. There is nothing good that can come from it. This is especially true for a man or woman with aspirations of someday being married. Great bonding can only occur if you are equally immature.

What does immature behavior look like?

Here are 8 sure signs you’re dating an immature man or woman.

● Makes comments that are insensitive & inappropriate

It is simply rude to tell someone that you are smarter, more attractive, or funnier than they are. Are we back in preschool? Bringing up imperfections is unnecessary, and the person who does this is clearly very insecure. When someone makes a comment that you know is totally inappropriate, model behavior that is mature: keep yourself calm and let your silence over the next few weeks speak for itself. Being aware of the impact of your words and actions is a sign of maturity.

● Texts you as his/her primary mode of communication

Texting is not going to end. There is no getting around this. Granted, some people do not enjoy talking over the phone. However, if there is someone in your life you would like to get to know better, texting them throughout the day and night is not the way to put your best foot forward. By using texting as your primary mode of communication, you may miss out on getting to know the person you have affection for in a healthy way. Take the plunge, put yourself out there, and pick up the phone to experience a real interaction.

● Ill mannered behavior

Many singles are asleep about behaviors that might be considered silly by some. Belching, passing gas, drunken conduct and not giving two cents about your table manners may get you on the do not call list if you are not careful. It is not cool even though in your mind you have been socialized to think it is. Being obnoxious and rude to service people is also a real turn off. Remember, how you or your love interest conducts him or herself both in and out of your presence could be a reflection of things to come, for better or worse.

● No respect for your calendar

The guy or woman who doesn’t respect the fact that you have a life outside of your friendship with them is demonstrating self-centered behavior and may not be worth your time and effort. This is typically seen when a possible love interest calls you and expects you to drop everything and be free that day or the next day. With all that is going on in life how can anyone expect you to be free? Plan ahead and give your girlfriend a few days notice to plan an outing. This is very important, especially in the first few months of dating.

● The communication is flat

The ability to hold a conversation about a topic other than the latest episode of House of Cards will be imperative for you to proceed to the next phase of the relationship. There is no harm in being one dimensional, just commit to developing good communication skills. Remember communication is the foundation of a healthy relationship and if the communication doesn’t flow the relationship will fizzle. Keep communication at the top of your list to foster a foundation for a solid relationship.

● Questionable hygiene

I am going to refrain from expounding on this topic. It speaks for itself. Make certain you don’t have a blind spot in this area.

● No clearly defined interests

Having clearly defined interests is a sign of a well rounded human being. Having wide interests is a key part of being characterized as “interesting”. If you are one of the millions of singles that do not have clearly defined interests, sit quietly and ask yourself what could I be doing that would really make me happy. As we all grow and mature it is very important that we get in touch with what brings us joy.

If it is you that is immature than you have a little work to do. To get additional laser-focused guidance about dating in the 21st century contact me for a complimentary session.

© Copyright 2014 Karla Moore. All Rights Reserved.

Dating Tips: How do I find a boyfriend? How do I get a date?

13872539-young-woman-with-doubtful-expression-and-question-marks-over-her-headThe big questions that most perennially single women ask themselves are ‘Where do I find a promising date?” and “How do I get a boyfriend?”  As a leading dating coach and matchmaker, I hear that question all day long. Of course, everyone’s situation is different, but here’s how I generally approach this.

1) The first step to finding someone special is to get in harmony with the idea of what it will really take to be in a relationship and to be a girlfriend. Are you ready? Are you really ready?

If you said yes then many of you have to come out of your shell and make yourself both physically and emotionally available for a potential partner.   Having a boyfriend is a wonderful idea, but you’ve got to be prepared for what it takes to find one, and then when you’ve found someone you like, you’ve got to commit to put the work in to sustain and manage that relationship.

2) Too many singles are WAY too passive about their love lives.  They are thoughtful and strategic about their careers, but think that love is just going to bop them over the head one day.  No, you’ve got to be just as strategic in love as you are in other parts of your life.  Take control of your ‘love search’.  Be aggressive about putting yourself in situations where you might meet someone.  Think about your love life multiple moves at a time like chess.

3) No matter what God has blessed you with physically, you can do things to put your absolute best foot forward.  How you look, what you wear, how you handle yourself, what you say, etc. (and much more) all makes a huge difference in how successful you will be in attracting and keeping love.  There are some basic tips that you should be aware of.  Ask me if you don’t know.

4) Where can I meet men? Bars are great for hanging out and having fun.  Forget about them as a place to meet a potential significant other.  Potentially impaired by both alcohol and ego around buddies, many men are looking for something other than a potentially serious relationship there.  For sure, spend more time out and around your interests – at parks, museums, churches, sporting events, etc. Heck, even hire a matchmaker to meet some incredible new men!  🙂

The mechanics of finding a boyfriend can be tricky but it is doable in a very short period of time if you have the tools and a clear head to execute it. In fact, it happens every day!  Heed these tips and you’ll be smarter about the process.  Peruse through this blog for further advice.  Contact me today NineGPS.com 404.496.8293 to learn how to apply these insights to your specific circumstance.

© Copyright 2013 Karla Moore. All Rights Reserved.

6 Dating Tips For Self Described Nerds & Geeks

1. Embrace You! You are who you are! Love you and claim you! Women love a confident man at her core. Take a deep breath, look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are amazing!
2. Recalibrate your self awareness. If you know you have some nerdy tendencies that have alienated women in the past,
get a dating coach to give you an objective perspective about  how you come across. A great one will work with your strengths and tweak your outer package.
3. Get sound feedback about how you look and dress. Let’s be honest about the fact that there are many cerebral types that are out of touch about their sense of fashion. For better or worse we are visual creatures and having a fashion foot in the 21st century will go a long ways with attracting the woman of your dreams.
4. Learn How To Approach Women – Remember men, it is your birthright to approach women. You must embrace this to its fullest and take the plunge as often as you are inspired. For example, every time you see a woman that you are attracted to find a way to walk up to her and ask her out. Easier said than done, I know. This will take practice, but start seeing yourself do this in your mind.
5. Remember the art of love is rooted in the law of averages. You must come to terms with the fact that persistence and repetition in the arena of dating is a must.

6. Listen and Ask appropriate questions. Most of us need to practice being good listeners and ask thoughtful questions that show her you are not self absorbed.

 

If you can burn these tips into your brain, you will have more of a fair shot at getting a first and second date! To get more insights on how these tips may apply to you inquire at Karla@NineGPS.com for a private consultation. I wish you well! Stay optimistic!

© Copyright Karla Moore. All rights reserved. Visit us NineGPS.com

Top 4 Dating Tips on How Singles Can Ditch The Drama

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1.  No Gossip:  Make a conscious and consistent choice not to gossip – no matter how strong the urge. Gossip is toxic on so many levels. It keeps you focused on negativity and breeds dramatic relationships.

2. Be Positive:  Be the change you want to see in the world. Train yourself to seek out the best in people and situations and to minimize your focus on anything else. Over time, this will acculturize like minded friends to also think this way and you’ll find the drama dissolving all around you.

3. Prune unhealthy friendships. In the quest for drama free relationships don’t be afraid to minimize contact with those people who aren’t on the same path that you are.  It may sound cold, but if your goal is to reduce the anxiety and negativity of drama-filled relationships, then sometimes you’ve simply got to ‘move on’.


4.  Let Go.  Much of the drama we have with those in our circles is derived from the emotional baggage that we accrue over the years.  If something is not in some way moving your toward your goal of peace and positivity, then LET IT GO. To forgive and forget is easier said than done – but it is often essential to your emotional well being. To get more insights on how these tips may apply to you inquire at Karla@NineGPS.com for a private consultation. I wish you well! Stay optimistic!

Visit us at NIneGPS.

© Copyright 2012 Karla Moore. All Rights Reserved.