New Year’s Resolutions:: 5 Dating Tips For Boomers & Seniors

1. Life is short for us all! Do yourself a new favor and commit to creating a vibrant social life for yourself in 2013. It will likely take you telling yourself “I am going to get out this weekend and every weekend I can.”Being a homebody is the safest and most comfortable thing we can do. You will not cross paths with interesting people of like mind unless you force yourself to get out and play.

2. Keep a close eye on the energy or vibe you project. This will require you to be self aware in a different way. We all emanate energy and when your energy is negative you will have challenges attracting a special friend.
3. Commit to exploring your world in a new way – unlike you ever have. This is scary for some but it can be done by taking small steps. Always remember there is someone for everyone. If you are new to dating, this affirmation will come in handy to keep top of mind.
4. Keep your outlook as positive as possible especially when chaos is on the horizon. Remember, you are walking this beautiful planet and because of that we should all be grateful. This is easier said than done when you are on the heals of a divorce or trying to wrap your mind around some other crisis. Despite your surroundings there is nothing more important than your emotional & spiritual health.
5. Forget about 2012. It is in the past! You have a new opportunity to start the year off fresh and make your social dreams come true. Commit to stretching yourself this year. To get more insights on how these tips may apply to you inquire at Karla@NineGPS.com for a private consultation.

© Copyright 2012 Karla Moore. All Rights Reserved. Visit us NineGPS.com

Dating Tips – Younger Women Dating Older Men: A Quick Reality Check

HandsomecouplejpgFor a woman in her 20’s and 30’s, dating a man in his 40’s and 50’s can be an intriguing option. Some women, tired of the hustle & bustle and ups & downs of dating men their own age find the contrast of a man who presents a more seasoned, grounded, financially secure, and more emotionally mature profile to be quite enticing. Older men can have a mystique about them that can be very attractive to a younger woman. He can wine and dine you and probably has the ability to lay on a certain kind of charm that is usually simply beyond what a young man can provide. He may even have picked up a trick or two in the bedroom that the young guys haven’t discovered yet as well! As with all things romantic though, a woman considering this kind of relationship just needs to go into it with her eyes wide open – being strategic and thoughtful about the relationship – understanding both the benefits and the potential shortcomings.While a man may have gained a measure of confidence and “smoothness” through the years, in all honesty, he may have also picked up some “baggage” along the way as well. Now to be clear, whatever our age or our circumstances, we all have baggage. It’s just that the baggage of an older man may be a new kind of baggage for a younger woman. Of course, front and center, there may be ex-wives and children in his life. These clearly don’t have to be deal breakers; in fact, children (both his and those the two of you create) can add enormous joy to your life. It’s just something to think about as you consider a relationship with an older man; both how you feel about it and whether you’re ok with dealing with it on a day-to-day basis.Similarly, his relationship with the mother of his children may be something new that you’ve never dealt with before; an “ex” that’s still on the scene. Do your best to understand the nature of their relationship (as parents) and determine what makes sense to you. As with all nuances of your relationship, communication is absolutely key. Do your best to understand as much as you can from him about these relationships and where you fit in his life vis-a-vis them. Understand as well that this might introduce a measure of complexity that you hadn’t considered. As with most things in life, there’s a cost-benefit analysis; do the positives of the relationship outweigh any negatives. For most, if they’ve found an otherwise loving and devoted mate, the “costs” are well worth it.

Your approach to much of this will likely be determined by your over-all perspective on life; whether you are a glass half-full or half-empty kind of person. Do you approach life, basically, from a positive point of view – with your eyes fixed on the opportunities, or are you more worried about minimizing the downside? If “it’s all good”, then perhaps simply being aware of what’s ahead will suffice. If not, then perhaps there are a few questions you should ask yourself before you head down a path with a man with these kind of family entanglements.

1. Will you be able to handle your future husband’s communicating with his ex wife on a weekly basis as he is co-parenting his children?

2. Are you clear about what your roll will be as a step-mother?

3. Can you accept the fact that your step children may never say they love you or call you mom?

4. Are you emotionally & spiritually strong enough to share your husband with an ex-wife?

I always encourage singles to “cast a wide net” in search of a mate. Certainly, dating someone older could be a part of this. It’s just a matter of being thoughtful and strategic about your love life. As we know, there are happy and healthy couples with significant age differences all around us. Maybe it’s something for you as well? On the other hand, perhaps you’re the type who wants to singularly co-create your baggage with someone closer to your own age. Know that the love of your life is out there and just be open to whatever package that he might come in. To get more insights on how these tips may apply to you inquire at Karla@NineGPS.com for a private consultation. I wish you well! Stay optimistic!

Visit us at NineGPS.com.

© Copyright 2012 Karla Moore. All Rights Reserved.

Dating Again After A Divorce

1. Time To Heal

Take a deep breath and make the choice to turn inward for a season. Reconciling with your exwife/husband – to emotionally put the relationship behind you – will be critical if you have aspirations of meeting a special friend. Remember for many singles it can be a red flag for a potential suitor if you are on heels of a divorce. No one wants to be exposed to unforeseen drama coming down the pike. If you dive in to a relationship too soon you could be setting yourself up for chaos.
2. Catch Up

If it has been 10+ years since you have been on the market, take the time to familiarize yourself with the do’s and don’ts of modern day dating. Social media and technology have put a new spin on dating and you will not want to feel like you are living in the stone ages around modern day dating etiquette.

3. Be Open

Stay open to internet dating and alternative ways of meeting great singles.  Remember there are millions of high quality singles on internet dating sites that are in a similar predicament as you are. Be clear and remember you get what you pay for. If you are trying to pinch pennies and go for the free sites you will likely come up short. Remember your $25 monthly investment will seem like a drop in the bucket when you meet the woman or man of your dreams. In short, don’t go cheap.

4. Hire A Dating Coach

Hiring a dating coach/strategist will keep you from spinning your wheels and learning from trial & error. Dating can waste an enormous amount of time and resources if you are out of touch with some of the unspoken nuances. Get the perspective you need so when you venture out you will be in an ideal space to attract a special friend. Remember, if you keep doing what you are doing your dating life will not change. To get more insights on how these tips may apply to you inquire at Karla@NineGPS.com for a private consultation. Stay optimistic!

© Copyright 2012 Karla Moore. All Rights Reserved.

Oops! I wish I hadn’t said that! Dating Tips

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Remember, the way you communicate will give the person you are sitting across from during a dinner date a wonderful glimpse into who you are. Learning how to fine tune your dating communication will be the single most important factor that draws her near or repels him away. Learning how to filter thoughts from your mind to your mouth takes work for many of us. Single men and women need to remember when you are on a date it only takes one slip of the tongue to say something that kills the mood. Learning how to play it smooth and keep all those opinionated thoughts to yourself for the time being can be challenging but will prove to be the right move in the long run.

Going on an extended commentary about who you know, what you have done and what you have can send messages to the opposite sex that you are needy and insecure. Learning how to be thoughtful about what comes out of your mouth takes self awareness. Self awareness is something that many singles need assistance with. The last thing you want to project on a date is that you are self centered. I realize your inability to manage this may be due to nervousness.

To learn how to reign in that nervous energy and understand precisely what to say and not to say on dates contact me for a one-on-one at karla@ninegps.com. Visit me at

© Copyright 2012 Karla Moore. All Rights Reserved.